863 words describing a kitchen utensil - really!

It does look like a prop out of Saw, besides being for food. I can imagine it being a pizza cutter, but really have no idea why you’d use this and not a knife. It looks like a mini machete, but it’s plastic so wouldn’t be much cop for hard foods. It bends both ways – the handle bends outwards whilst the tip of the saw-thing bends inwards. There are two jagged edges on the saw, but for some reason there’s a bit in the middle of the jagged edges that isn’t jagged at all, so you couldn’t use the blade the whole way down. The tip of the blade has two prongs, like the other end of a hammer, and again I have no idea why. It looks beige, but I’m colour blind, so am shooting in the dark…

It’s pretty dirty, and hasn’t been used for a while – or so I hope. There’s a hole at the top of it, to hang it up or something, or attach it to something. The handle has raised plastic, probably so you can grip it better, of differentiate between the handle and the saw so you don’t pick it up wrong in the dark?? One of the first indentations I noticed, besides the name of it, was the weird logo of a wine glass and a fork next to each other. Although this probably means dishwasher-safe or something boring, it looks like it shouldn’t be there and is a little out of place. The knife is apparently Tupperware – with a little R for registered trademark next to this name. There’s also a really weird circle outline near the top of it that looks like it was intended at the factory as a second hole similar to the first one mentioned earlier, but just looks out of place. This isn’t really that noticeable though unless you sat there, like me, with a magnifying glass and studied a Tupperware saw. This saw-thing has a sort of code on it – 46-14. This is probably again from the assembly line, and is also pretty boring to look at or read. Since this is also the same colour as the fork itself, you wouldn’t notice it – as intended probably – unless you studied the saw. The name on the side of the saw says Sli-Saw-All in capital letters, which is kind of misleading since it sounds like it can chop anything up. In reality, I’d be surprised if it could chop up even a pepper. The middle of the actual blade is raised, not sure why though. Again this is probably for grip, but I really have no idea. This bit of the saw is dirty on both sides, and probably the dirtiest bit on the whole object besides a little stain by the word Tupperware. The saw has been used a fair few times in the past, and has had quite a lot of scrapes in the process. The two prongs at the end of the saw have raised tips. Like most of the saw, I don’t know why these are there. I could hazard a guess to what it would be used for, but would have no idea where to start since the raised tips are only about 2mm tall and would hardly latch onto anything of significance. The tips look like they should be sharp, and on a metal knife they would be, with the tips facing outwards like two miniature blades built into the saw. There is an L shape at the end of the saw, that looks like a right angle but curvy.

There is a line going around the side of the handle, all the way around, like two sides of the blade have been snapped together like Lego.

There are 7 teeth on the smaller jagged section and 12 teeth on the second section, with around an inch gap between the two sections. The ends of both sections trail off in the way that there is another half-tooth that has been stopped from turning into a full one and rejoins the outline of the object’s shape.

On the back of the saw, just before the blade begins the handle is raised so that the blade protrudes slightly.

At first glance, it looks like a comb. Then again, it also looks like a tiny machete, and could easily be found swinging away in a jungle in a man’s grip. The object also looks like it could be a wrench, found in a car garage – if it was made of different material. Sticking with kitchen utensils though, it most resembles a spoon that anything else, with the general shape, like a lazy S, showing this. However, the use of teeth also makes it look a bit like a knife. The two prongs on the end of it look like the end of a hammerhead, used to pull nails out of the wall. For some reason it also roughly resembles them deep fat fryer things they use to fry chips in a chip shop – the metal cages I mean. I could imagine this being used in a doctor’s surgery – for what, I have no idea.